Negativity

This is going to be a weird, rambly post because it's hard for me to explain, but here I go. Lately, everyone has been posting on Facebook and just bitching in general about how they are going to "cut the negativity out of their lives." Which, to be perfectly honest, just confuses me a little. What exactly is the negativity that you are cutting out of your life? Because all I hear is "Waaaaaaaaa!"

Pictured: positive thinking.

I really do mean this in the nicest way possible, but all I can think every time I hear someone say that phrase is grow the fuck up. Which is just a little ridiculous because I am normally in no way shape or form what you would refer to as a grown up. Some of these people are my best friends. Nice, fabulous people, and I just happen to want to throw up on them every time I hear about "positive thinking" or whatever. It's like a fucking religion that they feel like impressing upon everyone around them. Thank you for wanting the best for me, I want that for you too, but I would like to not subscribe to your flawed, bullshit philosophy.

I mean, personally I like to look at both sides of a situation, weigh possible outcomes and then let myself feel bad if I've made a poor choice. Because I feel there is value to actually feeling something, as opposed to brainwashing myself into being okay with everything.

Pictured: positive thinking.

And then there's these sayings:
"Negative ppl are like rotten apples...they are good for nothing at all...and if you stay around them too long they will rub off on you!" #staypositive (sounds kinky)

"Negative people need drama like oxygen. Stay positive, it will take their breath away." (because suffocation is what positivism is all about)

"Good things will come to you if you focus on the positives and let go of the negatives." (this is scientifically proven!!! lol j/k)

"Negative thoughts only have one purpose: To destroy you!" (ugh)

"Overthinking leads to negative thoughts." (just don't think at all, you'll be the happiest!)

Fucking blow me.

I guess my biggest problem with it, however, is how people treat it like magic. "Just believe you can and you will!" has got to be one of the biggest fucking piles of shit I've ever heard. Because you know what? No. Just no. There are more factors. I'm not necessarily a negative person, but I have my moments. I like my negative moments. I learn from them. In general, however, I'm a realist. In my world, just believing you can is not sufficient to, say, winning a race. Or flying. Or any fucking number of other things. If you are no fucking good at it, and you don't practice, you can have all the positivity in the world, but you are still probably gonna fail. Good things do not just happen because you want them to happen.

I mean, okay. I have met some people who really love singing. And they have been taking lessons their whole lives. And they are incredibly driven and ambitious and positive. Guess what? They still fucking suck at singing. Caterwauling is about as close as they get. I'm not saying they should stop singing, if that's what they love doing. I'm saying, believing you can be good at something, doesn't make it so. And pushing away all the people who give you negative feedback...doesn't necessarily make any difference in the result. Except that you get this distorted perception of life, and then go on American Idol and make a total ass of yourself in front of the whole wide world.

Which I guess is what the whole positive movement is about...Perception. If you think you shit rainbows, maybe, in your own mind at least, you do. And if it makes you feel better, and better is what you want to feel, go ahead. I just don't feel like it's addressing the main issues at hand. And I think it's ignoring all the good things that can come from negativity. Negativity sort of forces you to look at and question yourself and others. You are literally seeing things in a different perspective. That is a good thing. It is healthy. I don't feel you can achieve any personal growth without both the good and the bad in life. This includes the "bad" or "negative" people. Because there's something you can learn from them too.

Of course, maybe I'm taking this all too literally and they just mean they're not going to eat at McDonald's anymore or something. In which case...yeah. Go you. Your arteries will probably thank you.

Papa's Day

Growing up, my Papa (what I call my father) influenced me in ways I wouldn't recognize until now-ish. I had an unusual childhood, but I'm grateful for it. My bedtime stories were from Ray Bradbury and Stephen King anthologies, we watched Star Trek and Outer Limits together, and I'd fall asleep to him playing the guitar. We'd take long walks and he'd always listen to my slowly forming opinions and interests. Even now, I can talk on the phone with him for hours and never run out of things to say.

My Papa is probably one of my best friends, and always will be. I am so proud of him for putting together his music and finally having it recorded. Now I can listen to it on YouTube or his music page on Facebook whenever I miss him.

Songspiration?

I'm pretty sure I'm singing in this year's Humboldt Idol at Downtown Sounds on July 5th. I say "pretty sure" because I'm not quite sure what to sing. By which I mean, of course, literally every song I sing well has suddenly fled my brain. Are there songs I sing well? Are they appropriate for a mock singing competition? What exactly do people sing at these things? I have watched maybe one episode of American Idol...I get the premise, but yeah.

I think I'm just making this harder than it needs to be (that's what she said), it is just a Chamber of Commerce event. But still. I will have some fierce competition with my Errrrique and his cousin singing as well. They sing like little angels.

So, if anyone can give me any song ideas...that would be greaaaaat. Just, ya know, not crappy songs.

MPGIS Season 2

"I don't know if you know this, but most guys don't want to fuck a girl with no arms. And the guys that do are very strange." -Deandra

Fuck yeah! The Most Popular Girls In School is back! I mean, technically they've been back for a couple months now, but I just decided to look it up yesterday. Episodes 14-25 now available. New episodes every Tuesday!

It is, how do you say, awesome?

Hating on Facebook - 2

You know what really grinds my gears? People trying to hook-up over Facebook.

I've learned that the only time a male messages you on Facebook is when he's looking for a hook-up. When did this become a thing exactly? When people stopped using MySpace? It just strikes me as a bit odd. Also, horribly offensive. Who do you think I am? Why are you so desperate? Leave me alone. Below are a few annoying examples.

1. The first time this ever happened to me, a person I know from high-school chatted me at 5a.m., which is basically noon for me. This person and I don't ever talk, I only even see him at the bar or at work.

Guy: what up hannah
Me: oh just bumming around. you?
Guy: boooooooored. what are you doing up?
Me: I just don't sleep. What are you doing up?
Guy: bored. can't sleep.
Me: well, ya know what cures boredom? sleeping!
Guy: so does a lot of other fun things but theres not a female here
Me: lol. so have fun with yourself?
Guy: just not as fun id rather have the real thing
Me: well, you can't always get what you want.
Guy: I want fun tho:( you wanna have fun hannah?
Me: Are you propositioning me? This is like the 8th time this week that's happened. Do I have a fucking sign on my head???
Guy: I take that as a no?
Me: pretty much :)
Guy:    :(

That was sort of a rough week for me. Everyone was mistaking me for a prostitute.

2. This happens sometimes...

Random Male Acquaintance: so I'm single now, wanna chill sometime?
Random Male Acquaintance: (a week later) my offer still stands...
Me: No thank you.
Random Male Acquaintance: k thanks for being honest.

Sometimes, guys with girlfriends hit on me. I tell them "ew! you have a girlfriend." That's not actually why I don't want to sleep with them. I don't want to sleep with them because they are slimeballs. But all they hear is the girlfriend thing. So they think now that they're single I will go for them? Dude, you don't even have my number. When I don't like you enough to even give you my phone number, just assume I do not want to sleep with you.

3. The most annoying to me is when people I don't know, and won't add because I don't know them, message me anyway and ask to talk.

Random Male: Hey what's up? I'm a good friend of (person I know-ish). We just met at your workplace.
Me: Um. Hi.
Random Male: Can we talk and get to know each other?
Me: I'm a lesbian.
Random Male: So we can't even talk and be friends?
Random Male: You there?

What a needy creeper. No, we can't talk. I barely text my actual friends, talking on FB is super inconvenient since I don't have the FB messenger app, I'm at work, and I don't want to know you. I just met you ten minutes ago and you have already virtually stalked me. Also, you are ugly. Let's just call it "never meant to be" and leave it.

4. And then there's this guy who used to be a regular at the gas station, so I kinda knew him. I thought he was dating someone I knew. He asked if he could add me on Facebook, so I was like, whatever. Then a day later he sends this.

Random Douche: Hi Hannah :) If you wanna txt me my number is 1515-XXX-XXXX. I haven't been on here very much lately.

Yeah. That's gonna happen...NOT. Why would you tell me to add you on Facebook to then tell me you don't go on Facebook, and give me your number instead? Why on earth would I want to text you? Nice try, guy.

5. This most recent offender was another kid I went to school with and haven't talked to in forever.

Random Male Acquaintance: What's up beautiful
Me: looking up random old school computer games with some friends. you?
Random Male Acquaintance: just laying in bed now bored.

Aaaaaand you mentioned bed, used the word "laying" improperly, and called me "beautiful" (which may just be a personal turn off for me, but whatever). Not talking to you anymore. See, I'm getting better at early detection! Hilariously enough, he messaged my friend a few days later and said she sounded like a kinky girl and that he'd rock her world. Ugh. Just, ugh.