MPGIS Season 2

"I don't know if you know this, but most guys don't want to fuck a girl with no arms. And the guys that do are very strange." -Deandra

Fuck yeah! The Most Popular Girls In School is back! I mean, technically they've been back for a couple months now, but I just decided to look it up yesterday. Episodes 14-25 now available. New episodes every Tuesday!

It is, how do you say, awesome?

Hating on Facebook - 2

You know what really grinds my gears? People trying to hook-up over Facebook.

I've learned that the only time a male messages you on Facebook is when he's looking for a hook-up. When did this become a thing exactly? When people stopped using MySpace? It just strikes me as a bit odd. Also, horribly offensive. Who do you think I am? Why are you so desperate? Leave me alone. Below are a few annoying examples.

1. The first time this ever happened to me, a person I know from high-school chatted me at 5a.m., which is basically noon for me. This person and I don't ever talk, I only even see him at the bar or at work.

Guy: what up hannah
Me: oh just bumming around. you?
Guy: boooooooored. what are you doing up?
Me: I just don't sleep. What are you doing up?
Guy: bored. can't sleep.
Me: well, ya know what cures boredom? sleeping!
Guy: so does a lot of other fun things but theres not a female here
Me: lol. so have fun with yourself?
Guy: just not as fun id rather have the real thing
Me: well, you can't always get what you want.
Guy: I want fun tho:( you wanna have fun hannah?
Me: Are you propositioning me? This is like the 8th time this week that's happened. Do I have a fucking sign on my head???
Guy: I take that as a no?
Me: pretty much :)
Guy:    :(

That was sort of a rough week for me. Everyone was mistaking me for a prostitute.

2. This happens sometimes...

Random Male Acquaintance: so I'm single now, wanna chill sometime?
Random Male Acquaintance: (a week later) my offer still stands...
Me: No thank you.
Random Male Acquaintance: k thanks for being honest.

Sometimes, guys with girlfriends hit on me. I tell them "ew! you have a girlfriend." That's not actually why I don't want to sleep with them. I don't want to sleep with them because they are slimeballs. But all they hear is the girlfriend thing. So they think now that they're single I will go for them? Dude, you don't even have my number. When I don't like you enough to even give you my phone number, just assume I do not want to sleep with you.

3. The most annoying to me is when people I don't know, and won't add because I don't know them, message me anyway and ask to talk.

Random Male: Hey what's up? I'm a good friend of (person I know-ish). We just met at your workplace.
Me: Um. Hi.
Random Male: Can we talk and get to know each other?
Me: I'm a lesbian.
Random Male: So we can't even talk and be friends?
Random Male: You there?

What a needy creeper. No, we can't talk. I barely text my actual friends, talking on FB is super inconvenient since I don't have the FB messenger app, I'm at work, and I don't want to know you. I just met you ten minutes ago and you have already virtually stalked me. Also, you are ugly. Let's just call it "never meant to be" and leave it.

4. And then there's this guy who used to be a regular at the gas station, so I kinda knew him. I thought he was dating someone I knew. He asked if he could add me on Facebook, so I was like, whatever. Then a day later he sends this.

Random Douche: Hi Hannah :) If you wanna txt me my number is 1515-XXX-XXXX. I haven't been on here very much lately.

Yeah. That's gonna happen...NOT. Why would you tell me to add you on Facebook to then tell me you don't go on Facebook, and give me your number instead? Why on earth would I want to text you? Nice try, guy.

5. This most recent offender was another kid I went to school with and haven't talked to in forever.

Random Male Acquaintance: What's up beautiful
Me: looking up random old school computer games with some friends. you?
Random Male Acquaintance: just laying in bed now bored.

Aaaaaand you mentioned bed, used the word "laying" improperly, and called me "beautiful" (which may just be a personal turn off for me, but whatever). Not talking to you anymore. See, I'm getting better at early detection! Hilariously enough, he messaged my friend a few days later and said she sounded like a kinky girl and that he'd rock her world. Ugh. Just, ugh.

May Remembers

I haven't really posted this month. I've been in a weird mood. In May I feel like I get to be openly sad without being a freak. Maybe that's not actually true because after 8 years  people might think it's insincere. But it's not. To contradict myself a sentence later, I guess it's not exactly sadness anymore, though. It's more...reflection. I just like to reflect upon the sadness. Remember my time with Chad. Remember losing Chad.

remember to never lose this comic.

I go back to my old blog and read through 2005. Remember how Chad influenced my life. Remember when Chad told me he was gay. Remember our car rides. Remember who I was at that time. It's strange to remember feeling all those things, being in those places, but also feel strangely disconnected with that girl that was me. That embarrassingly open book of a girl. That dumb girl. That naive girl. That awkward girl. I don't see much of her in myself anymore...even though I am still sort of all those things.

May is a time of learning. Learning to move through life again, like I did all those years ago. Learning that I can make new habits, form new friendships. And I can lose them all and still exist. May is a time of acceptance, and defiance, and happiness amidst the shitty. May is a time of many cigarettes.

Sugar Rush

I'm in a pretty great mood right now. Maybe it's because I just got done watching 3 seasons of The Guild with Tyler, and also consumed way too much sugar (Coke). I am super sad this is probably the last season. But anyway, Tyler's into this MMO, Neverwinter, and got me really psyched to try it...then I get home and can't download it b/c my computer tells me there's a virus in the download. Fail. Whatever, I'll figure it out later. Not gonna bring me down.

I worked out yesterday, so I feel like sitting on my ass and drawing is a valid option for today. I have been seriously slacking in the artsy department lately, but I feel it's been balanced out by the devotion I've shown in attending music events.

LAZERfest was pretty great; got trashed, got a sunburn, almost got smushed to death, made out with a guy from my high school days randomly, went home, passed out. Good day. Then Sunday I went to Byron's in Pomeroy, Ia to watch The Sundogs. Mostly Dan Lodden just decided to kidnap me out there, but it was a good time. Byron is super nice and his bar is actually a pretty rad atmosphere. Live music most Sundays, so I might try to make it out there again at some point.

Memorial Weekend I might try to make it out to that thing at the Meadow, and then June 1st there's that thing at the Ballroom. Not to overwhelm everyone with specificity, or anything. But I'm pumped. Last year, nearly all my plans to do things fell through for various reasons, so I'm just trying to make the most out of this one.

And not cry myself to sleep every night from missing my BFFF who will be in New York all summer interning and just being generally awesome. Away from me. But don't cry for me Argentina, I've decided this summer is going to be rad.

Although, that could just be the sugar talking.

Random Childhood Memory

When I was 6 or 7, I was at a Thanksgiving at my Great Uncle Manson's house (I used to call him Uncle Mansion...he had a big house). All the children went out when it got dark and were playing flashlight tag. At some point, this got boring, so they decided to play a different game. I don't know what you call it, but one cousin grabbed my hands, the other my legs, and they picked me up and started swinging me.

this, sans black guy jumping around.

This was probably the most terrifying thing I had experienced at that point in my life. I don't know why, but probably because I gave neither my consent, nor would they let me go when they heard me screaming and crying. They just laughed. I should mention they were all quite a bit older than me, 10 or 12 maybe. When they finally put me down I'm pretty sure I ran to the grown-ups, sitting with them the rest of the night. I remember feeling shame at being so helpless, and rage at their ridicule. Rage at the way the grown-ups dismissed what I felt was a great indignity.

I saw that GIF the other day and it brought that terror and shame back to me in a perplexing flash.

Looking back on this, I realize the only reason I reacted that way was because I was singularly unused to other children. I was an only child still, I had no close relations my age around, and my friends were church kids. Every childhood indignity was deeply traumatizing to me because of my lack of interaction with other children. Now that I'm older, I can set it on a grander scale and say I probably still struggle with this as an adult. Which is just a little ridiculous, I think.

Sleepless Saturday

Saturday was a long freaking day. I worked Friday overnight, so just stayed up all day since the way everything was scheduled would make sleeping an impossibility. I did accomplish a decent amount, however, so I guess all's well that ends well.

First, Kari and I got our hair cut, then had some Lomitas(yum!). Then we trekked to Algona and got some pretty sweet tattoos from Jesse Willison. So glad he's already super good. Also, so sorry we took ten freaking years. Don't know how that happened. Pretty sure he hates me now for all the tiny fucking lines.

palm sized.

Then, next door at the Afterlife was Battle of the Bands, where I got super trashed trying to battle my severe sleepiness. These bands were the highlight of the night for me:

Twenty 2 Salute is always a good time (if you know what I mean *winkwink*) (I mean they are good with their hands) (on guitars and such) (this is so much dirtier than if I had just said nothing) but I was also glad I caught Smoothwood because I've been into classic punk sounds recently. I think we got back to town around 2ish? I was mostly off my face at that point. So of course I went to an afterparty to annoy people. At least I saw Clinty there, love him. Think I got home at 5am or so. Halfway through a slice of pizza, I finally passed out.

Anyway, I think being out and about was good for me as I haven't really socialized in a long while. Mostly I've just been too lazy. Think I'm returning to lazy because now I'm just at this point where I should do dishes and laundry, but won't. All I've done the past two days is work and watch Hemlock Grove. And my back hurts. And it feels like someone shot me in the arm. I mean, I paid someone to basically stab me in the arm a bunch of times, but still. Why you hurt so much, little heart?

Also, my hair is purple...but more on that later.

Lazerfest 2013 Mix

It appears that I am finally going to Lazerfest this year. For the first time. WTF? I know. I've just never really felt like it/had to work every other time. This year, my Cathy's BFF, Katie, is coming to town for it, so I'm really excited. For Katie. Not so much for the musical line-up (I've not been as into rock as I used to be)...but, that's what this mix is for. To get me pumped. I guess.

I'm not buying an Affliction shirt, though.

1. Man in the Box- Alice In Chains (Cha! Sha-wing!)
2. Last Resort - Papa Roach (I know this one!)
3. Glycerine - Bush (never been a huge fan, but mmm...Gavin Rossdale...)
4. You're Going Down - Sick Puppies (I do like them a bit)
5. Heaven Nor Hell - Volbeat (his voice annoys me for some reason, but they aren't bad)
6. Vilify - Device (is that the guy from Disturbed?)(yes. yes it is)
7. I Get Off - Halestorm (forgot I liked them)
8. Bones - Young Guns (never heard b4...but I kinda like it) (breaking benjamin-esque)
9. Two Weeks - All That Remains (possibly the only song of theirs I know)
10. The Final Episode - Asking Alexandria (asking who? oh, screamo)
11. In Due Time - Killswitch Engage (I've heard of them...more screamo)
12. War of Change - TFK (what does this remind me of? Linkin Park?)(Christian rock Canadians)
13. Oh You Petty Failures - Blood N Stuff (okay)
14. Fatal - Fatal Addiction (Winner of Battle of the Bands for opening band)